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  • Sarah Wells

Having Needs Doesn't Make You Needy

For whoever needs to hear it: Having needs doesn't make you needy. It makes you human.


What if...

instead of judging yourself for your needs, you became super curious about them?


What if you asked questions like:


"I wonder why this need is popping up again?"

"I wonder how I can satiate this need in a more sustainable way?"

"I wonder what this need is an indicator of?"

"I wonder what signals I could be looking for in the future that might give me a heads up about this need next time?"


I wonder.

It’s the power phrase for when you're ready to stop hating on yourself.


Get curious about your needs. We all have them. There's no reason to judge them. And if you find yourself perpetually judging your needs, them perhaps you could ask these bonus questions:


"How come I'm so resistant to admitting that I have needs?"

"I wonder why I am okay to meet others' needs, but not my own?"

"How were needs modeled and communicated to me as a kid?"

"What does it mean about someone when they have needs? How did I develop this belief?"

'What consequences might I face for being needy?"

"What do I believe about myself based upon my needs?"


The answers to these questions can be incredibly insightful. This is allllll a part of showing ourselves more compassion. I say this often: no true progress comes from hating on ourselves.


I would LOVE your feedback on this post. What question was especially insightful for you? DM me on Instagram @kelseekeitel and let me know!


If you're into self-reflection, and want some more prompts to get to know yourself in a deeper way, grab my free Journaling Jumpstart of 33 of my favorite journaling prompts and be sure to listen to the Journaling Jumpstart podcast episode that teaches you how to break every rule about journaling that keeps your writing blocked and your pages blank!

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